I Almost Said Yes. Then I Didn't.

Hello,

Something happened recently that felt like one of those small-but-deep life lessons. It all started with a dilemma. Nothing dramatic or life-changing, but one of those moments that shake you just enough to make you stop, think, and grow, if you let them. So I thought I'd share it with you, because we all face dilemmas from time to time, and how we deal with them can make all the difference.

Here’s what happened:

About a month ago, after I sent out the second newsletter in this series, I received a touching message from Anna (not her real name). Anna is a special woman in her own right, but for me, she holds an even more special place. She was the very first Dutch patient I treated when I opened my first clinic in the Netherlands, around 13 years ago.

Back then, even in her early 80s, she used to cycle five kilometres each way to come for treatment. I always admired her – sharp as a tack, positive, radiant, and calm, no matter what life was throwing at her. She came for monthly maintenance treatments like clockwork, with this quiet awareness of her body and well-being that was just inspiring.

When I moved my clinic to Nijmegen about six years ago, we slowly lost touch, and eventually our paths drifted apart.

Then, about a month ago, she wrote to me again. She’s now 91, uses a wheelchair, and has been dealing with daily headaches and severe shoulder pain that’s been keeping her up at night for months. In her usual polite, graceful tone, she asked if I might consider coming to her home to treat her with "those magical needles."

My immediate inner response was - Of course! Not because I do home visits (I don’t), and not because it made any logistical sense (it didn’t), but because I was deeply moved. Also… she’s 91. And to be honest? I kind of missed her.

But then my rational mind kicked in. And all the practical reasons started surfacing:

I don’t have a portable treatment table.

One or two treatments wouldn’t be enough, and committing to regular home visits on weekends just isn’t realistic.

I’ve been working on setting clearer boundaries for myself.

It’s a 30-minute drive each way.

I could go on, but at a certain point, I realized, with the help of my own inner compass (and a conversation with my wife), that this time, I had to say no. And it wasn’t easy.

I wrote her an email. Not a comfortable one to write, but honest, respectful, and true to my capacity and limits.

But hold on, don’t get too sad just yet. It turns out that life has a way of taking unexpected detours.

Two weeks later, Anna wrote again. This time, she said a friend of hers had offered to drive her to the clinic.

And sure enough, she came. It was such a heartwarming reunion.

At the end of the session, as she was getting dressed, she lifted her arm effortlessly, without even realizing it, as if the shoulder pain had never existed. A week later, she came back for a second session and told me the shoulder pain had completely disappeared. There’s still some weakness in her hand, but compared to how things were, it’s a world of difference.

And the headaches? They eased significantly in the days after the first treatment.

As I sit here writing this, I’m still amazed. Because honestly - I never expected that kind of improvement at 92. Not even in my most optimistic dreams 😊

Tip of the Week

How do you know what the right choice is, when you're stuck in a dilemma?

Let’s be real. If there were a magic button that said “Click here for the right answer”, we’d all be pressing it without hesitation. But life, in its beautiful complexity, doesn’t usually work like that.

So, here’s a little method that works for me, and maybe it’ll work for you too:

1. First, pause. Before jumping to fix, please, or rescue. Just take a breath, Pause. Check in with yourself: what’s really going on inside?

2. Tune in to your heart. How does this feel to me? Not what I should do, but what feels true and aligned with who I am.

3. Then, bring it to mind. Don’t ignore your rational side. It’s there to help. Ask: “Is this sustainable for me?”, “Will this cause harm in the long run?”, “Is there a middle path?”

4. If you're still not sure - talk it out. Sometimes, just sharing with someone who listens can help the fog lift all on its own.

5. And here’s something important - don’t stay stuck for too long! Being in limbo, undecided, drains your energy. It keeps you suspended, in a kind of emotional and mental holding pattern. And paradoxically, it’s often better to make an imperfect decision than to stay stuck in uncertainty. The sense of relief that comes from simply making a choice.

Even if it’s not ideal, it can be more valuable than overanalyzing every option.

6. And finally – accept that you might not know for sure. Sometimes, there’s no perfect answer. We make the best decision we can, with what we have in the moment. And that’s more than enough.

So next time you find yourself in a dilemma, try listening to both your heart and your head, and also to the quiet space in between. Because often, that’s where the simplest answers are hiding.

Before We Say Goodbye...

If you’ve made it this far, thank you. Really. That means a lot.

I hope this little newsletter gave you something to take with you into the week, a thought, some inspiration, or maybe just a quiet smile.

If you ever feel like sharing, responding, or just saying hi, I’m always happy to hear from you. Wishing you a gentle week ahead, with fewer aches and more sweet moments.

Warmly, Zohar